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Three Dimensional Highway Robbery

Hello there reader, you don’t know me, but I’d like to talk to you about the Nintendo 3DS today. As you’ve probably been made aware by the gaming community creaming its collective internet pants this morning, Nintendo held a press event to cover the “features” of their new 3D handheld device. While I could list out all of those “features” for you I’m pretty sure you’ve either already looked at them, or are going to be doing so between now and the 3DS’s March 27th release date; so I’ll spare you all but one detail.

I’d like to discuss the one feature that a had me doing a spit-take of Cinnamon Toast Crunch all over my monitor this morning, and that is the 3DS’s $249 price point. Think about that for a second, let it soak in and stomp around your brain. You did in fact read that correctly, TWO-HUNDRED AND FORTY-NINE U.S. DOLLARS. (Or for you European folks, £229.99.) Nintendo wants you in this tough economic time, to pay almost three-hundred dollars for a handheld gaming device. Apparently they didn’t learn from the PSP Go fiasco, and decided that your hard earned income is entirely disposable.

To better put the 3DS’s outlandish price point into perspective, I’d like to point out that you can get a brand new 250gb Xbox 360 Slim (online) for less than the price of a of a 3DS ($234.99). The same can be said for a new 120gb PlayStation 3($167.99), and that thing plays Blu-ray movies. The most advanced consoles in the history of gaming are both cheaper than a hand-held device that features three-dimensional gaming without glasses. Don’t get me wrong, the 3D without glasses thing is cool, but not $249 cool. For the love of Kratos, it doesn’t even play movies like it’s overly-expensive-until-recently counterpart the PSP does. Am I the only one who thinks Nintendo has crossed the line here?

Yet despite the blatant high-way robbery that Nintendo is about to commit, almost no one seems to be talking about just how insane this is. Have we as a community become so complacent with companies forcing us to take astronomical price points right in the keister, that we just don’t care anymore? Or has Nintendo really suckered most of the gaming world into believing that 3D gaming is worth your first born child, soul, and the deed to your house? Whatever the reason, I’m appalled more people aren’t as disgusted with the price point as I am. Seriously folks, wake up and realize you’re being screwed by a company that claims to love its fans.

Who knows, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe the tech is so impressive that it justifies the George Bush level of stupid price point. If that is the case, I’ll be the first person to admit that I was wrong and write a retraction singing the 3DS’s graces. I highly doubt it though, besides the 3D gimmick, theres no feature I can imagine blowing me out of the water.  Again, I need to stress the fact that minus the 3D gaming, whatever the 3DS does, my consoles and PC can do more and run in 1080p. Now before you get all excited and go “yeah but the 3DS is portable”, I’d like to point out that the Xperia Play (PS Phone) is also portable and will be able to play games that would make the 3DS explode, not to mention make phone calls. Now that is a device I’d be willing to pay two-hundred and fifty bucks for.

In closing, I’d like to encourage you to seriously stop and think about what Nintendo is doing here. Please keep in mind that there’s no evidence that a three-dimensional gaming market is even viable, let alone going to stick around long enough for you to get your money out of the 3DS. Are you sure that you really want to spend that kind of cash on tech that while albeit cool to look at, lacks any sort of substance? I know I for one will not be purchasing the 3DS, and quite frankly will be reconsidering the relationship Nintendo and I have had over the years.

Feel free to argue with me, (or maybe even agree) in the forums.

Author

Kyle joins us from Minnesota, where he has been gaming almost his entire life. He is awesome and will be regarded as such.

Twitter – @Kmanchester

12 comments

  1. See, this is why I hate Nintendo.

    • Hey NP, thanks for taking a look at the article.

      I don't personally HATE Nintendo, but they've done enough stuff to warrant a second look as to if they're the fan-centered, friendly, "honest", company they once were.

  2. You’re absolutely right. But people got used to getting butt-raped by Nintendo. And when the gaming press can do nothing other than kiss Nintendo’s rear end, what do you expect? The younger generation is so stuck on fanboyism they will ignore what is good for them and go for what is bad for them out of misguided loyalty no matter what system/company it is. It’s sad, but as insanely expensive as that handheld is, even though we are in a depression, that stupid device will sell out. It’s a shame, but that’s how it is.

    • Hey Wally, thanks for reading.
      It seems to me that us "holy shit that's expensive" folks are in the minority here…and you're right, the gaming press can do nothing but kiss Nintendo's mediocre ass. It's a sad, albeit true fact. Oh well.

  3. $250 is not almost $300 it is just $250 and considering what you get with it that really isn't that bad.

    • Thanks for the comment BT. I'm curious to see what you think we're "getting" with the 3DS though. From all the info I've read on it this is what my understanding is:
      -3D tech that isn't real 3D (google D.o.F.)
      -Graphical capabilities that rival the old DS
      -An inferior web browser that runs at speeds that rival 1st gen phones
      -$39.99-$49.99 games that lack the substance of their $59.99 console counterparts

      If that justifies a $250 bill, then by all means enjoy your 3DS. It's not like I'm going to go out and protest the 3DS in front of Best Buy or something. If people want to spend the money, fine…do it.

      Thanks again for reading.

  4. You come across as a real jerk in this article. I was fully expecting the 3DS to be 250 bucks. Any less and I would have been shocked. How does that sound so outrageous? I'm an unemployed college student and that price sounds fine to me. I mean, I just payed that much for two used books that I'll probably get very little use out of.

    • That's great Z Bone, I'm glad you feel the tech is worth the $250.

      I on the other hand don't, hence the article. It's outrageous to me because quite frankly, besides the 3D gimmick Nintendo isn't offering anything NEW. If they had completely revamped things, and produced a truly new handheld system… then MAYBE I'd pay the $250.

      As for coming across like a real jerk, I'm sorry you feel that way. That being said, if my disgust with Ninendo's assrapery of the gaming community puts me in the "jerk" category…so be it. I'd rather be a jerk and spend $250 on 4 new games, or a second ps3/360 than bend over and let Nintendo shove an inferior piece of tech and it's price point right in my bum. That's just me though, if you're cool with it, then who am I to judge.

      Thanks for reading.

  5. I am totally with you on the price thing but I have zero empathy for you. You realize that us European fools are the ones being robbed? Whatever can be said about economies or tax and vat rates there's no excuse for charging us £230 which by the way is approx. $365!

    Until I can get one for $250/£155 they can keep their 3DS and burn in the flames of Uffern!

  6. O_O Europe is not only Pounds we use the Euro obviously.

    Pounds is UK

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